I'm so discouraged. I know there's a need for what we're trying to do. In fact, we were asked if we could pick up leftovers from the market itself and deliver them to a food bank. But we didn't get enough information in time and weren't able to do it today. I hope we can at least cover that need next week, but we have to spend some money on more food-safe containers. We don't have any money. Today a lot of food went to waste, and I wasn't able to stop it.
When I say we don't have any money, I'm not being facetious. Until we get an answer from Social Security about disability, we can just about make our mortgage payment. That's it. No utilities, no gas, no buying food or investing in Benefit Brownies, much as I'd love to. I have to be the driving force behind this effort, and I'm running up against a brick wall.
Even on this difficult day, after staying up all night packaging 400 brownies, after having hopes dashed and good intentions thwarted and finding apathy where I expected enthusiasm, I'm still so much better off than the people I'm trying to serve. I still have shelter, food, friends & family, and a million other joys every day that so many people never feel. Comfortable furniture. Refrigeration. A car. Internet access. Hope for better times, and the likelihood that those times will come.
As heavy as my heart feels today, I can't imagine how much worse it is for those who have no hope.